Being nice is good. Saying yes to every request one can handle is also nice because every act of kindness is fulfilling even when the process is sacrificial. The feeling of contentment follows every act of kindness.
But when on the contrary one feels regrets, sad and bitter before, during or after what was supposed to be an act of kindness, it means that it’s not done willingly and one shouldn’t do something good for someone else that one would regret doing.
But the thing is, ‘no’ is never an acceptable answer to a request. Some people look at the person who says no as bad. They won’t understand why.
If B asks A for something, something B knows A can offer, A is not expected to say no, he’s expected to say yes to continue to be that loving person.
If A says no to B’s request, it’s likely that B will feel bad and even take an offence, but in pretence may say, “it’s okay. I’ll manage” – an external show, deep inside B will be thinking, “You have what I’m asking for, yet you’ve denied me of it, you’re just being wicked.”
So instead of saying no, A might say yes and make a promise that he or she will end up not fulfilling for fear of being labelled ‘a bad person’.
But failing to keep a promise is worse than saying no to a request.
Personally I find saying no hard but breaking a promise brings tears to my eyes especially when there is nothing to do..
I choose to say no when I can’t be able to help.
What about you? Do you find it hard to say no to requests you know you can’t be able to fulfill?